Nine Lives (2016)


As a committed aiurophile I was not prepared for the long-ish first sequence in Barry Sonnenfeld’s film. Tom Brand (Kevin Spacey) is an irritating over-achiever billionaire building the US’s tallest skyscraper with the aid of his underappreciated son David (Robbie Amell). Meanwhile his beautiful wife Lara (Jennifer Garner) and chirpy daughter Rebecca (Malina Weissman) are struggling for attention. He knows Rebecca wants a cat for her birthday, but he’s allergic and wants to get something else…. his suggestions at an employees’ meeting persuade him he’s wrong, he better get her one, so fetches up at Mr Purrkins’ Shop, an emporium of all things feline, including proprietor Christopher Walken. Aaahhhh!!!! Now you got me. Brand takes Mr Fuzzypants with him to meet his treacherous right-hand man Ian on the top of his tower, which is now in competition with another erection, and lightning strikes … Bingo! There’s a changing places scenario which is simply hilarious. As Brand malingers in a coma, Mr Purrkins’ plan to teach him how to be more human means he endures grotesque indignities in learning how to be a better-behaved cat as well as trying to figure out how to convince Rebecca who he really is. It takes a while to bed in, the boardroom shenanigans are a necessary subplot, but this is funny as hell, especially if your cat has ever tried to use a pen. Purr-fect!