Y’all know this one: Derek Zoolander is the thickest man on the planet – he’s a model, doh! So he’s recruited by evil designer Mugatu as a Manchurian candidate to assassinate the Prime Minister of Malaysia (the cue is Frankie Goes To Hollywood’s Relax). The centrepiece of the movie is his walk-off against fierce rival Hansel, moderated by David Bowie (he loses.) Another highlight is the meeting with conspiracy theorist David Duchovny who used to be the world’s greatest hand model. And what about the guys playing with gasoline hoses at the forecourt and then lighting a cigarette … Yikes! The looks are of course legend – Blue Steel is how Derek made his name! The aphorisms are hilarious, the set ups are to die for and you know, above all, Moisture is the essence of wetness and wetness is the essence of beauty. I know you know that because I’m telepathic: bulimia is so cool. Anyone who read Bret Easton Ellis’s Glamorama knows that this was lifted pretty wholesale and uncredited (they settled out of court). But this is way funnier! If you don’t crack up better check your pulse, dude.Directed by Ben Stiller and written by him, Drake Sather (yeah, right) and John Hamburg. And Bret Easton Ellis.